Oh boy. Hallelujah. Whoopee. Christmas is right around the corner again. Can you believe how quickly that happens? Now all of us have to run out and buy well thought out, considerate, fanciful, imaginative, originative presents for our loved ones. Presents that perfectly match their every desire and secret wishes. Presents that show we, out of everyone on the planet know them to the bottom of their souls and hearts because we love them so deeply.
Add to all that the clear assumption at least by the department stories and most people whether they know it or not is that the amount of money spent is in direct correlation with how much we love and care about this person. If the stores had their way, when you asked their advise for a present, the first and most important question they would ask is "Well, lets see here. Tell me this. How much do you love and care for this person"? Same thing is true for choosing a casket for your loved ones who pass away but that's a whole other story to tell...
So...............I see myself as a pretty typical male and I'm telling you right now that us typical males are the worst present pickers in the entire universe and beyond. We have no clue whatsoever how to choose something special, creative and special, especially for our waaaaaaaaay better half's, much less the rest of our "loved ones". We never go to the type of stores that carry anything close to things our loved ones would actually love to have from us in the first place. If it's not at the auto parts store or hardware store, how in the hell are we supposed to find anything?
What's happened also through the years is all the old standbys that men used to be able to give (lucky bastards of yesterday) are all completely unacceptable in this new world we find ourselves in nowadays. Men used to be just fine with kitchen items for instance. Well....no more huh? That is now just a hint that they should just be barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen cooking your meals while you set in the front room watching sports on the TV and having your nightly relaxing drink that we so clearly deserve after a hard day at the salt mines.
Now in my personal case and lots of others I'm sure, what used to be normal choices become less and less acceptable. My waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay better half does not like jewelry at all! Can you imagine what that does to my gift giving potential? That's right. You heard me correctly. Not even earrings, bracelet's, watches, rings or necklaces. Nothing at all! Lets try collectibles. NOPE! She doesn't collect anything at all. We basically have no shelves at our home whatsoever to put nicknack's or collectibles of any kind on. Now, I have to say I'm the same on that front so that's cool with me but it sure takes a whole world of present material out of the picture, now doesn't it?
Here's another weird, odd thing about this whole subject also. In general, this whole "problem" of gift giving is only a problem for the giver. The receiver in this scenario usually is quite calm and not stingy at all. The receiver would be quite happy with just a small thoughtful present, even just a hand made card that shows the giver cares and thought about the receiver. The saying "It's the thought that counts" is so true it's amazing. Especially as we get older, there really is not much we actually need someone to get us. All we really want and expect is some show that they care/love us.
I don't think I'm giving out any kind of family secret here when I tell you that for years, I would call our daughter and ask "OK honey. It's time again. Tell me what to get Mom for her birthday/Christmas or anniversary". She most times had great ideas just off the top of her head and I got to take credit for being super cool on the gift giving front. I shamelessly used her very ample creativity relentlessly for years. I'm pretty sure my waaaaaaaaaaaay better half knew this secret all along or she does now for sure........."^)
My waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay better half and I have finally and thankfully reached that point in life where we just choose something we both want for the house or life in general. The next and I think final stage of life would be the way some friends of ours in their late seventy's handle it. They don't even give any of those holidays a second thought at all. No gifts, no cards. Nothing. As far as they are concerned, they don't need to bother with that crap anymore at all. Not sure what I think about that but it is what it is.
OK, that's all the bullshit I can think of right now to add to this subject. Now, here's your assignment folks. Read the instructions below and put in the "comments" page your suggestions for presents for me and other men reading this to give our waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa better half's. Come on now. There has to be several people out of all the hundreds who regularly read this who have cool ideas and suggestions for creative, loving, expressive, thoughtful presents. Tell us about them........Pretty please. Save our asses......
READ THESE INSTRUCTIONS VERY CAREFULLY AND FOLLOW THEM EXACTLY!!!
Right at the bottom of this posting is a "Comments" link. Click on it, follow the instructions and leave a comment about this post. You can use your name or make up one, by CLICKING INSIDE THE CIRCLE beside "Name/Url", or just leave your comment anonymously by CLICKING INSIDE THE CIRCLE beside "Anonymous".
I will receive an e-mail, OK it and then it will appear for others to view after they click on the comments link.
COME ON..........DO IT!!!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
4 comments:
Give us time together, doing something, or nothing. Going for a walk, looking at the stars, sitting in front of a fire, listening to the rain, talking about something you read that made you sad, glad, angry, or confused. Believe me, when there isn't someone to share these simple treasured moments, material gifts are just stuff.
Here's a list of things for the Waaaayyyy Better Halves gifts...
Idea #1 - Take her to dinner and let her witness you selecting a family at the restaraunt that looks like they may need a little boost, then pay for that families dinner anonymously...then look over at your better half and tell her she brings out the best in you!
Idea #2 - a gift certificate to the Red Lantern Refelxology place in Downtown Auburn...Oooohhhh it's Awesome!Better yet, do a duo appointment, you'll be glad you did!
Idea #3 - Write her a poem and send it to the Letters to the Editor. Keep a copy just in case it doesn't get published and tape it to the dashbaord of her car. Better yet, write a poem a day for a week and place them all over the house.
Idea #3 - Find an event that would knock her socks off and take her to it - even if you can't stand the thought of it!
Idea #4 - Do all of the above!
Good Luck!
From your Crazy Neighbot T
Admittedly, when a woman is not into jewelry that does complicate
matters. It forces one to be more creative. Also added to the mix is
age. The older we get the more we're into getting rid of crap, not
accumulating stuff destined to end up in the re-gifting drawer. And
yet there is great pleasure in giving and seeing the look on the
receiver's face that says, "He gets me."
I have some ideas for you. I haven't seen or talked to Patti in years
so I don't know what she's into these days. But here goes:
music & books - can be easily personalized
a massage - love them but too extravagant for today's budget without
feeling guilty; great if it comes as a gift though.
a basket with small gardening tools & gloves - I have these small
versions of a pick, spade, shovel, etc., the big ones being too heavy
for me to handle. My sister got them for me years ago and I use them
to this day.
fleece slippers for winter - We're barefoot here most of the time but
if I were on the mainland I'd have them to wear around the house in
winter. Real sheepskin ones are nice.
pashmina - (cashmere shawl). The real ones (beware of fakes) are
expensive but they weigh next to nothing, are softer than rabbit fur,
and warmer than a baked potato. (In interest of full disclosure, I
have pashiminas of the highest quality left from when we had our
store, $400 Neiman Marcus caliber. I got them direct from the weavers
in Kathmandu through a friend and sold them for $150. Would sell for
$100, including gift wrap. Colors: navy, celery, gold and rose.
art and /or craft supplies - Watercolor markers and/or paints, good
paper, pastels, etc. There are several good catalogs that have
everything from paints, inks, brushes, handmade paper, to easels and
frames, etc. Check out Daniel Smith out of Seattle or Dick Blix (you
can find them online). They will send you a catalog full of ideas
upon request.
a ping-pong table - Great fun, keeps reflexes sharp and good
exercise. Need a place to put it though.
Small digital camera if she doesn't already have one. I don't, but
wouldn't mind one of my own. Ralph takes all the photos. My old
camera died years ago.
A new sewing machine if she sews. The new machines, even those at
around $100, can do all kinds of things. I still have my old one from
college days. It runs but has limited function.
If I think of anything else I'll pass it on.
A hui ho,
Jamie
Admittedly, when a woman is not into jewelry that does complicate
matters. It forces one to be more creative. Also added to the mix is
age. The older we get the more we're into getting rid of crap, not
accumulating stuff destined to end up in the re-gifting drawer. And
yet there is great pleasure in giving and seeing the look on the
receiver's face that says, "He gets me."
I have some ideas for you. I haven't seen or talked to Patti in years
so I don't know what she's into these days. But here goes:
music & books - can be easily personalized
a massage - love them but too extravagant for today's budget without
feeling guilty; great if it comes as a gift though.
a basket with small gardening tools & gloves - I have these small
versions of a pick, spade, shovel, etc., the big ones being too heavy
for me to handle. My sister got them for me years ago and I use them
to this day.
fleece slippers for winter - We're barefoot here most of the time but
if I were on the mainland I'd have them to wear around the house in
winter. Real sheepskin ones are nice.
pashmina - (cashmere shawl). The real ones (beware of fakes) are
expensive but they weigh next to nothing, are softer than rabbit fur,
and warmer than a baked potato. (In interest of full disclosure, I
have pashiminas of the highest quality left from when we had our
store, $400 Neiman Marcus caliber. I got them direct from the weavers
in Kathmandu through a friend and sold them for $150. Would sell for
$100, including gift wrap. Colors: navy, celery, gold and rose.
art and /or craft supplies - Watercolor markers and/or paints, good
paper, pastels, etc. There are several good catalogs that have
everything from paints, inks, brushes, handmade paper, to easels and
frames, etc. Check out Daniel Smith out of Seattle or Dick Blix (you
can find them online). They will send you a catalog full of ideas
upon request.
a ping-pong table - Great fun, keeps reflexes sharp and good
exercise. Need a place to put it though.
Small digital camera if she doesn't already have one. I don't, but
wouldn't mind one of my own. Ralph takes all the photos. My old
camera died years ago.
A new sewing machine if she sews. The new machines, even those at
around $100, can do all kinds of things. I still have my old one from
college days. It runs but has limited function.
If I think of anything else I'll pass it on.
A hui ho,
Jamie
Post a Comment